A new beginning: What is health?

A long time ago, I wanted to make this a health blog. I am fulfilling that wish today. In wanting to be completely transparent, I will say that I have recently become a Beachbody coach. With that said, I became a coach because I believe in it. I am open to questions about it and will offer help to anyone who wants it. That is not what is blog is about though. I may mention it here and there, but it isn't the purpose of this blog. I will be posting lots of information and stories here.

What is health to you?

That really is a loaded question. Health means many different things to many different people. To some people, health is about not being sick. To someone with a chronic disease, it might mean they are living without exacerbation or complications from their illness. Since I cannot answer for everyone, allow me to state my definition of health. 

To me, health is a three pronged approach. It is something that I really felt was true, for me, when I battled cancer. I believe health is achieved when there is a balance of body, mind, and soul. Websters dictionary defines health as the condition of being sound in body, mind, or spirit; especially :freedom from physical disease or pain. The World Health Organization states that health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.When one of the prongs is not properly balanced, everything winds up out of whack. 

What is health without vitality? 

It is not impossible, but it is extremely difficult and rare to find a person who exudes vitality but is not healthy. Really, the end outcome I hope to achieve, in my own life, is living a life of vitality, one the is strong, energetic, and full of purpose. 

I challenge each of you to discover your own definition of health and start assessing where you are. Start working on some goals and find a way to find the best you that you can be. There is no one right way for everyone. We are all different. There are just as many different ways to become healthy. It starts with one step at a time. Hopefully, I can help you with at least a couple of those steps, but you have to do the work. No one can do it for you.

I have started a new Facebook group as a support, challenge, and accountability group. If you are interested in joining, contact me or make a comment. I'd be more than happy to add you. I am hoping the group with have get togethers, group exercise events, and I am trying to figure out how to hold a cooking/tasting event as well. Everything is in the beginning stages, but I am really excited about it.

Long time no blog

Time is flying by for me right now. I can't believe that there is only 9 days left in January. Wasn’t New Year’s just last week? Time moves even faster at work than it did when I was in school. I didn’t think that would have been possible.

Speaking of work, Michelle (my nursing sister sent to me straight from Heaven) and I have gotten some very humbling and honoring news! We have been selected to be preceptors for the new residency program they are starting at our hospital! The idea behind the residency is that the resident follows three different preceptors over an 18 week period. The first preceptor would be with a novice-advanced beginner nurse. This is where Michelle and I fit. We have been told that we are advanced beginners. The next preceptor will be a competent nurse, and the third preceptor is an expert nurse. We were selected by our nurse manager and were the only two selected from our cohort, although some were not eligible due to the fact that they work nights and they are not using night nurses at this time. I think they find that it is too hard for the night shift residents to attend day shift classroom training.

Needless to say, Michelle and I are very humbled, honored, and excited. We graduated together, were hired for the same floor and shift within a month of each other, and now will be preceptors together. Bellevue has really set us up for an amazing start to our career. I never thought that I would be doing as well as I seem to be doing and becoming a preceptor in less than a year from graduating nursing school, and yet here I am. It is one of those things where you feel that others must see something in you that you just are not seeing in yourself. Above all other feelings is the overwhelming appreciation and excitement that I am going through this with Michelle. It has been such a comfort to have each other to go through this journey with. We have laughed, vented, and supported each other in the med room while waiting in the line during med pass time or after work with a beer. It has been a very blessed gift.

On a not so worky note, things are starting to progress with the home renovations. Alan has actually started putting in our new flooring. It is really nice and I am excited for it to be done. We have a lot of plans. Hopefully we can get it all done by next Christmas. We are replacing the flooring in all the downstairs, redoing the guest bathroom and the kitchen. I am also giving the rooms a “face lift” as we go. I also plan to turn our coat closet into a mud area…since I can’t really make it a mud room. Of course there is my sewing room, which hopefully we will be turning into a nursery at year’s end too. I actually just bought my first furniture for it on craigslist. A friend of mine knew I really wanted this particular piece and sent me a link for it. We are not even trying yet…but it was such a good deal that I had to get it!

At any rate, I have stolen enough of your time for now. Hope all is well out there! 

Free time, CT scans, and a nursey update!

Alan and I have thoroughly enjoyed working the same hours for the first time in our marriage. Since I work every other weekend and have random days off during the week, we still have time to ourselves but get to see each other a lot. It has been so nice to have time off without worrying about school work or things going on in school. We have actually taken time to go out and do stuff. We have especially enjoyed being able to do our walks so often. We are going for a weekend trip this coming weekend.

I had another oncology appointment this week. My scan was clear again! It is hard to think that it really has been a year and a half since I finished chemo! So much has happened and yet it still feels like yesterday. She moved my scans up to every 6 months…which is amazing!!! My next scan should be done in April, but since Alan and I are planning on trying to start our family in April, I will be getting my next scan Feb/Mar time frame. As long as it is clear again the doctor says that we should be good to go and my scans can then be annual. It is all very exciting!

I have 10 days left of my residency! The last two shifts I have had 6 patients. It has been difficult, but I am getting it done. It will be a few more months before I even begin to feel comfortable with that number of patients. It won’t help that I will not have a preceptor to help me in 10 days time, but luckily the girls on my shift are very willing to answer questions. Our charge nurses are usually willing to help out too. Still, to think I will be unleashed onto the public without anymore supervision than any other nurse is freaking me out! Lol. I wouldn’t change it for anything though. It’s just baby chick nursing nerves really.

It is really extraordinary how much I have learned and how far I have come in the last 10 weeks. I would not say that the residency I have gone through is the best residency around. It hasn’t been bad. It has the potential to be so much better of a program; however, I could not imagine coming onto my floor without it. It has been worth every minute. I still have so much to learn.  My charting is getting better though. There are so many things to chart, so much redundancy, and so many different places to chart. You would think they could make it so much easier since it is electronic now. It is getting better though. I still say the best thing are those patients that I really connect with…and the after work, late night happy hours!

Some nursey notes...

Being a nurse is a strange thing so far. On one hand, your hands are tied in so many ways. You have to have an order for everything, even compression stockings. If a patient takes a drug at home they take it, but in the hospital they can’t if it is on their medication administration record. On the other hand, you are free to make clinical judgments and deviate from the plan as needed. They don’t give you a lot of rope, but it is enough to make you a rock star or hang yourself.

One of the very things I have loved so far is the patients! It is true that I will not like all my patients and not all of the patients are going to love me; however, this has not been the case so far. I love that I don’t know their religion, personal politics, or even their views on ham sandwiches. We get to be just a couple of human beings working for the same goal for a few short hours of their lives. They most likely won’t even remember me in a few months from now. So far, most of them just love to talk about their families and pets. I have had some great patients. I have also had some demanding patients, but when you see what they are going through you tend to have some compassion about it. I guess that is easy to do when you only get two patients a day though!

There have been some strange transitions for me with this job. I spent more time at Children’s hospital than anywhere else in my last year of nursing school. They monitor those kids so much that I am not used to just getting one set of vitals at the beginning of the shift. I also was never allowed to give narcotics, so med passes were much regimented and the scheduled meds were scheduled so that you weren’t passing meds back to back hours. That isn’t always the case at TG, but I do find that there are ways to help that as well. I also don’t have parents to work with…for the most part and certainly not in the same way. The patients tend to be a little bigger too…just saying.

Today I go to work and I don’t know who will be my preceptor. I don’t know if they will let me even take patients, although I would think since I have already been taking patients that this would not be an issue. I do hope that the next time I work with my regular preceptors that I will get three patients. I feel ready for it. 

Work, good times, and girl on girl crime!

So much has happened I don’t even know where to start. I am still making the rounds to try to spend time with friends and family. My schedule is way better than school, but my days off vary and my hours are from 3-11:30 pm.  It can be still be a little hard getting my schedule to match with others.  At any rate,

Work…work has been so great. The floor I am assigned to is very busy and can be overwhelming, especially for someone new like me. I have been getting used to how things get done. I will say that there are a few things I am seeing that I don’t like and will try very hard to not take on as a habit when I am done with my residency. I also know that is easier said than done; however, there are many good things I see as well. Regardless, I am so excited that Michelle will be starting soon. I am so excited to be working with her!

 I am very impressed with the CNAs. Most of them are very hard working and really do a great job. I hope to always be the nurse that recognizes them and their work. I never understood people who treat those under them as though they are not as important. CNAs do the work they do so that I have more time to do the things I need to. Often those things are the more time consuming and dirtier jobs. That doesn’t mean I don’t or won’t ever do those things, but I have other things that are needed to be done that only I can do.

BSN…I was accepted into Bellevue College’s RN to BSN program. I will say I was very honored and excited to be accepted; however, I decided it was best to decline at the moment. I have spent the last 4 years giving up a lot of my free time to studying, including studying on vacations, and lived in a constant state of stress trying to make the grades to get into and pass the nursing program. It is so nice to have my free time to myself without worry or extra added stress. Alan is also happy to have is happy go lucky wife back. We are truly enjoying just being together. We also want to start a family. We have to wait until at least April so that I can get my paid maternity leave when the baby comes. I also think that trying to work fulltime, being pregnant/new mom, and going to school would not be the best idea.  The other consideration is that I am a new nurse with a residency and contract to work FTE 0.9 for at least 1 year after my residency. I really want to focus on becoming a great nurse. It is a lot to take on right now. I feel like school would detract from all of that. I have decided that I will take the next couple of years to enjoy life some, start my family, and become great at my job. Those are my priorities right now.

Troutdale…Alan and I headed to our favorite concert venue, Edgefield McMenamin’s , to see Death Cab for Cutie. We are not diehard fans or anything, but we like them enough. We want to go to one concert every summer at Edgefield and that was the one concert we both liked enough to go.  The venue is one of the best outdoor venues either of us has very been to, and the property is super fun. If you ever go I highly recommend going to the outdoor seating restaurant and getting the Cajun tots! They are amazing. We stayed in a hotel over night and got some breakfast at the Black Rabbit. Again…the food there is also very good. We had a great time!

BBQ…I had my BBQ to celebrate all things nursey in my life this summer. It was pretty awesome. There were 2 notable absences, but as they were both really unavailable…they are forgiven! It is really amazing how many people Alan and I have in our lives that support us. We are such lucky people. The weather was just great and Alan did so much to make the day run so well.

On a side note…I am really working hard to become the person I want to be. One thing I am trying to do is be more kind. Part of being more kind is not talking negatively about people and also accepting people for who they are.  It is a work in progress. There are still a couple of people who I still have some negative feelings for or at least have a hard time accepting the things I find negative about them. I am guilty of some girl on girl crime, especially when the hate force flows strong during the ultimate girly time; however, this is not acceptable to me.

I don’t understand why we girls continue to be ok with talking about each other behind each other’s backs or judging each other in such harsh ways. It may feel juicy at the time, but what does it really do to us and our friendships when we do this? I have lost more than one friendship to it. Once you start to judge harshly and talk behind the other person’s back, it isn’t too long before you have talked yourself into not liking that person or have talked someone else into not liking them. One friend in particular I feel I am no longer friends with because their friend did not like me. Instead of this other person coming to talk to me like an adult about any offenses I caused, she just continued to talk about me behind my back while being so very sweet to my face. Before you know it, my friend stopped being so nice to me and it wasn’t long before we were no longer friends. I in turned then was not nice to her behind her back, but in fairness…I wasn’t really nice to her face either.

My point is, why the girl on girl crime? Why do some girls just accept that is the way we are (yes, I was informed of the fact that is is just the way we are) and why does it seem that there is such a resistance to not be this way? When I suggested to a group of girls that maybe we try not to be that way, I was looked at like I was a leper!

Needless to say, I was really taken aback. I even tried to make an example of how I disliked a store, but I didn’t judge people who shop at this store because the fact they shop at this store is inconsequential and just because I have very negative feelings towards the store does not mean I have to have negative feelings towards the people who shop there. I couldn’t even make my point because they were all offended when I mentioned the store…which became very obvious that they all shopped there pretty quickly by their offended looking faces. They did not like feeling judged as I said exactly why I hated the store, but all of them had all just been very judgmental and talking badly about someone else. They had even laughed about being able to judge other people and then talk about it behind their backs at one point in the conversation.  Of course none of them saw the irony in this.

My goal is to not partake in this kind of conversation anymore. I might slip up here and there, but I hope that any true friend of mine calls me on it when I am not meeting my own standard. I would also challenge my friends to also try to give up the negative, gossipy conversations. It is time that we stop beating each other up and start realizing what is it in us that makes us act this way. At the end of the day…the judgments you have and make about others has nothing to do with the people you make them about but is 100% about you. This is the hardest thing to realize and to figure out sometimes.

In between jobs and other such nonsense!

I have less than 4 days until I start my first day of training for my new nursing job! It is all classroom type stuff and I won't even get on the floor for two weeks. I don't mind though. I appreciate the training. We never got that much for clinicals and I always felt that charting took a while to get right because of it. 

 My last day at work as really kind of weird. It was happy and sad. I have learned so much as a phlebotomist and I am walking away with a very good skill to have as a nurse. I have received a lot of support from my coworkers in my endeavors at school and with my health issues. There is a part of me wished I could stay, but I really want to move forward. I have made some very good friends.

I have spent the last few days just trying to get things done and also spend some time with people I haven't seen in a while. I haven't gotten to see everyone...but I am making the rounds. Yesterday I was doing more domestic tasks, but today was more social. I got to hang out with some of my old classmates this morning. We met up for a bite to eat and catch up. It is really nice to spend time with them. I missed them so much.  My second year of nursing school wasn't quite the same without them! Then I met up with a friend from the lab for dinner and a movie. My social calendar is actually full all weekend. I forgot what that was like.

Tomorrow will be the farewell celebration for one of my closest friends. She is moving to Kauai, HI! I am going to miss her so much. She has been such an amazing friend and role model in my life. She calls me on my shit but does it in a way that is helpful and meaningful. She is honest, and lets face it...there are not too many people in this world who are willing to be honest or want honesty back in return. Although I am not losing a friend...I will miss her being so close. I am so happy for her. This is her dream and I think she is one of the bravest people I know to dive head first into the life she dared to dream for herself and not settle for the comfortable and secure. 

I have been doing fairly well with food as of late. I have decided that while I am still in this transitional phase I will not follow a particular diet or exercise program. My goal at the moment is to just make the best decision I can in the moment. What does that mean??? Well, I bought healthy food for home and to take to work and when I am out I will get food that is the healthiest pick for where I am at. Of course, I need to like the food. There is no point in ordering a healthy meal I will not eat, but it needs to be the best I can do for myself. I feel this is going well so far. I have been really tested while out and about the last couple of days, but I have made appropriate choices. Trust me...I could have gone crazy at the french bakery with my girlfriends this morning...but I got a healthy salad and had half a pastry! I even took cherries to the movies for a treat!

Things have not always been so easy and I have had my fair share of difficulties in the last couple of years, but I feel that things are going my way right now. I have been so blessed for the last few months, and I know just how amazing it has been. I feel like I am on the precipice of the person I am becoming. It is scary and exciting at the same time.

Jobs and Dreams!

I GOT THE JOB!!!

I found out that most of the residencies at MultiCare come with the job as long as you pass the residency. What does that mean? That means that I have a job passed the residency!!! I am technically hired for the floor. The residency essentially becomes a great version of on the job training!

To say I am excited is an understatement! It is a good thing that the HR person on the phone could not see me as she told me the details of my new position as a nurse! I am not so sure she would have continued with the conversation! LOL! I was in a fit of random, excited, flailing movements that should only be done in private, if at all!

I count my lucky stars and do not take for granted that I am one of the lucky few. There are still so many of my classmates who have not found job yet, or the jobs they found are less than good. It isn’t all luck that I have a job either. I have done things to try to place myself in the best possible position to get one. I am no more deserving of this job than my cohorts, but I do realize the awesomeness of getting a job less than two weeks after passing the NCLEX.  I could not have dreamed that things would go this well once school was out!

I started this year out with many plans and the big ones are coming into fruition! I do realize that I was overly ambitious with thinking I could accomplish all my plans, which is something I tend to do. I am working on being more realistic with my time, goals, and resources. My list of 34 is going to have to wait. I am going to have many of the things on that list done, but not everything. Not only have some circumstances changed, but I was really unrealistic with what I thought I could accomplish while in school and this summer. It’s ok. I am going to get there. In the end, my intentions are being realized. I am reaching those flying dreams!