Me vs. Food

We all have our vices. Some people drink, some smoke, do drugs, engage in risky behavior…mine is food. I love food. I love eating, trying new foods, the socialization that comes with it. I have a love affair with food that I am having such a hard time shaking. It is my coping mechanism, and it works great for reducing my anxiety. It does not work well for the other aspects of my life, however.

I truly feel that my diet and lack of regular exercise played a real part in my cancer. Not only do I feel that my diet will contribute to me possibly getting cancer again, but I know that it is killing me slowly…a silent killer. So then the question is…why do I continue to eat myself to death?

The answer is I don’t really know. The whole situation is complicated and yet simple at the same time.  I am loaded with excuses and reasons. I have habits that are hard from me to break. The things I have tried to change in the past don’t do for me what eating something I truly enjoy does.

I love it when people say I should exercise! Even as a nursing student, I don’t buy into what they say about how you feel when you exercise. You know how I feel? Tired…no exhausted! That whole thing about feeling energized after working out does not happen for me. I find myself struggling throughout the rest of the day. If I try to exercise later…I still feel tired, but I find it hard to actually go to sleep. I find the whole thing stressful trying to figure out in my already busy schedule when I should workout. It takes forever to go to the gym, change, work out, and then shower. I worked out 4-5 times a week for two years, one of those years with a personal trainer. It never got easier or more enjoyable for me. If it had, wouldn't I still be doing it? It never became a habit. Admittedly, exercise is something I need to do, but is it a good substitute for food for reducing my anxiety? I say no.

I do love doing things outdoors. I find that things are much nicer and easier for me during the summers, but when you live in the land of perpetual rain…outdoor activities are not really practical. I never thought I would miss the Colorado weather, but I do. It may be freezing cold during the winter, but at least the sun shines more than not. I have also greatly improved my tolerance to colder weather.  With that said, I am on a quest to find a substitute for food.

I have looked into things like support groups for overeating and other resources, but I have yet to find something that I think works for me on my schedule. There really isn't much out there unless you want to pay and arm and a leg. If you are willing to sell your first born child, there are numerous resources at your disposal. Sometimes it feels like a conspiracy or that no one takes this problem seriously. The usual thing you hear is, “drop the food fatty,” or “go to the gym.” What people don’t realize is that this problem isn't just about laziness, although that plays into it, but there are multiple layers of why someone like me is the way they are. It just isn't that simple. It took 33 years of living to get to this place. I don’t pretend that I can fix it in a matter of a month.

So, what does all this mean? I don’t know, but I am going to start today with something simple. I am going to get back into the habit of drinking 64 oz. of water a day. I was doing really well with that before school started. It will be my step one of my journey to health. I will drink my water every day for the whole week. Next week, I will pick a new step.

Why will drinking 64 oz. of water every day be my first step? Glad you asked.

Water is the single most important thing you can put in your body. It makes up 2/3 of our body weight.  The human brain is made up of 95% water, blood is 82% and lungs 90%! Did you know that mild dehydration is the main cause of daytime fatigue? Did you know that caffeine causes dehydration? Water helps regulate body temperature, lubricates joints, lessens the burden on the kidneys and liver by flushing out waste products, carries nutrients and oxygen to cells,  protects body organs and tissues, helps prevent constipation, helps dissolve minerals and other nutrients to make them accessible to the body. It is vitally important to our cell health and metabolism. We can go 7 days without food, but we can only go 3 days without water. It is our life elixir and helps keep us looking and feeling younger.  It is recommended that adults drink 64 oz. a day to maintain a healthy level of water in the body.

So there it is in a nutshell…I don’t have any real answers yet, but I will be using the bathroom a lot this week until my body it used to the amount of water I will drink again!