Accomplishing and Accepting!

First off, if you took me up on my challenge of doing something for yourself...how did it go? I have not gotten to quilting yet, but everything else I have either done or have plans for. I am going to try to fit quilting in this next week. 

Wow! What an amazing and yet difficult 3 weeks it has been for me. School has been super crazy. Our schedule last week alone just about killed me. It was busy enough, but I also wound up having to squeeze in an MRI appointment because a mix up at the doctor’s office and had my oncology appointment as well. Everything considered…I feel good about declaring that I kicked serious butt!

My oncology appointment went well. I am still cancer free, and we have made a plan for how to move forward with my follow ups and trying to conceive. She feels comfortable with Alan’s and my plans, which makes me happy. If she were not comfortable with it, I would have to reconsider and the fact she is comfortable means that things are progressing as well as could be. My next appointment will be in April…my one year anniversary of my last chemo and being officially cancer free! I cannot wait!

School has been a challenge so far. There was so much information covered in such a short amount of time. Our first exam covered over 800 pages, or 23 chapters, of information. No I did not learn everything. There is no conceivable way to have learned it all unless you have a super computer brain and/or have photographic memory. I wish I had photographic memory! It sure would make things easier! We also had all of our orientations for clinical. I also had to attend my prenatal/birth class. It was a lot. I still managed an 88% on my test. I am very happy with that, especially when considering all the other things I am trying to accomplish this quarter.

Which reminds me….

I have accomplished all but one of the tasks I needed to accomplish by now! I have lost 5 lbs in the last 10 days. This is especially awesome since I have the propensity to gain weight while in school. I did not have a specific weight loss goal for the last 10 days particularly, but I did want to add 2-3 extra workouts a week and eat better. I have done that. I think my weight loss is a good measure of how well I am doing with those goals. I wanted to pass all my tests for the first 30 days of school (short term goal), and so far so good. I also wanted to find 3 ways of loving myself in a healthy way and incorporate it into my routine somehow. The exercise and eating was one, spending quality time with myself was another, and getting back to photography was the other. I make myself spend at least 15 minutes every day checking in with me, and I have plans to meet up with some other photographers for a photo day in Seattle and to meet up with some old photo buddies for a night out. The one task I have not done well with was from my list of 34. I have not found it easy to try one new recipe a week. I think I might actually revise that to trying a new recipe every two weeks. That seems more realistic with my schedule right now. I might change that back after school is over.

One more thing I have been working on is accepting myself…not just the things I like but the things I don’t like as well. This is actually something I have been doing for a while, but thought that today would be a good day to share a couple of the things I have come to accept. Today’s things are not hard to share…I may share others later. For today my acceptance items are:

 I am a cheesy person. That’s right…I love hallmark cards and cheesy song lyrics. I like gooey romantic gestures and corny quotes. I don’t like it with everything, but deep down my soul is made of proverbial aged gouda and young brie!

I am an emotional sap and can cry at the drop of a hat! This one I really have hated at times, but actually I like being a sap. I have true and deep feelings. I am easily touched by the good in this world be it a simple gesture or one of those cheesy movies I like. I don’t mind showing that vulnerability anymore.

I judge others harshly and lash out when I feel wronged by them. This is something I am accepting in myself, but also working on changing. Just because I accept something about myself does not mean I have to continue to let that be a part of me. This is a defense mechanism I have built in myself for who knows how long and I am learning to let it go. I recognize this feeling and its actions as part of who I have become, but I do not want it to be part of who I am becoming.

All in all, I feel good about where I am right now. I still have a lot of hard work ahead of me in so many facets of my life, but I am looking forward to the challenges. I may not have an impressive house, an awesome car, or even the things I want for myself right now but I am happy. Today, that is all I need!

So that will be my next challenge to you! Have you completely accepted yourself, flaws and all? I may be obese, but I love my body! I am working hard to change it to be better, but I still love it! Can you say the same thing? What is it about yourself that you don't accept and can you find a way to accept it? Or, do you truly accept yourself already? It's something to think about..